


Blood Rose

by Sheiala



Category: Protector of the Small - Tamora Pierce, Tortall - Tamora Pierce
Genre: Anger, F/M, Gen, Loosing control of yourself, M/M, None described rape, Past Rape/Non-con, fucked up personality, lying
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-04-26
Updated: 2014-04-26
Packaged: 2018-01-20 20:55:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 2
Words: 10,715
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1525385
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sheiala/pseuds/Sheiala
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Shang sends an apprentice to the Tortallan page school, to train a year to forfill the treaty, the pages expect a well mannered legend in working, but what they get is Cassandra Qunai a strong Shang apprentice who hate all of them, will she survive the year, or will the secret she is carrying destroy her and all around her?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

So, This is the promise I made a new chapter! Or rather a re-released chapter, this is the first chapter. Enjoy!

* * *

 

"Do you understand these rules?" Lord Wyldon asked, looking over the desk that he was sitting behind.

In front of him were two people **,** a young man and a girl ready to bloom into womanhood, both dressed inthe traditional travelling gear of Shang-warriors. Closest to the door were the man standing in his early 20's, he was wearing black trousers with leather shin protectors, which were also coloured to nights colour. His black shirt was almost skin tight but still allowed him free movement. Moreover, on his well-toned arms there were black leather armour pierces to match the ones on his shins, and leading up his body to the ones covering most of his front shoulders **.**  Many people would not care to look at the man twice, but if you looked closely, you would notice the thin silver band that was snaking around his upper arm showing that he was a high-ranking Shang warrior with the immortal status.

He was wearing a dark tan which hinted that his origins was not of Tortallian decent, rather it was speaking more of the Carthakian jungle area, his brown short cut hair was still damp, from the bath he must have taken when they arrived only an hour before from the Shang camp.

Beside the Shang-Warrior was the sharp looking female who looked to be around her 17th year. Her clothing was matching the older Shang-Warrior with the difference that her upper arm had instead a thin grey strip, marking her as a student of Shang. However, despite of her lowly student ranking her crystal blue eyes was hard and weary just like the males. If you compared their outward appearance otherwise, they could not be more different. Where the man was of a standard height, maybe even a little on the short side of things, still full of muscles and strength. She was tall; her build reminded more of that of a cat. Even if her arms shown some strength there was no way she would be able to wield the long double-handed sword that was resting on the man's back, instead she had two short bladed swords strapped to her back, and at her thighs 10 very small throwing daggers, easy to reach should she ever need them

Another major difference the warriors had were their hair; where the man was cut short, hers was kept long. Hers were even in laid in a high braid that reached her hips. A funny thing for a warrior, where hair was normally always kept short, the long braid was almost of a white blond colour that her blue eyes and paler skin shown at her collarbone normally covered by her buttoned up shirt proudly showed her Tortallian decent. She had a light tan, showing of many hours of working in direct sunlight, but nowhere near the same as the man beside her.

She would have been pretty to look at and would have fit well into the court of Tortall, had it not been for the thin silver scar running down her left cheek, and with the multiple small scars around both her wrists and hands. This added with the cold look in her eyes, made it easier to believe that she was member of the Court of the rogue.

She looked at him, like she was awaiting permission to answer the training master, permission she got by a small nod: "I understand the rules Lord Wyldon, and I can assure you I have no interest in any of the males here." She made a half-deep bow with her head, as in showing she respected his rules "I promise by Mithros that I will follow the rules."

Lord Wyldon looked over her once more, his eyes resting on her long hair for a moment "You can talk with the servant about a haircut; the hair is going to be major disadvantage for you when you follow our training. I do not know how you train in Shang but here we will not go easy on you in practice. Every advantage that can be made will be taken, and that covers gripping."

For a short second joy was to be seen in the blue eyes of the girl before they again went cold, "Don't worry your Lordship, I don't expect anybody to go easy on me, and if anybody grabs my hair they will regret it." She carefully pulled her braid to her, showing how little spikes was braided into the braid itself, not big enough to rip clothing or her back while it was free, but if anybody did the mistake of grabbing her hair they would be in for a nasty surprise.

"Very well, you will be at the hall when the supper bell rings with the new pages, is that understood? There sponsors, mostly elder pages will be chosen to show you around before we go down to the mess" again a nod from the girl, Lord Wyldon waved her away showing that she could take her leave, which she did while leaving the room with a light bow. Leaving the training master and the older Shang-Warrior behind to talk.

Out of habit she stopped shortly in front of the door, as if she was hoping to catch a little of the talk. However, the men in the office were talking far too low for her ears to catch the sound, she slowly instead started making her way towards the pages wing.

Once she arrived the first person she met was a short and thin woman in a dark skirt and white blouse, which looked like to be the servants official uniform. She looked at the blond "I'm Salma, I will be showing you to your room Page Michelle."

"Michelle is fine, I'm no page, they can put me in a uniform like them and make me look like them but I'm a warrior, not a doll for the king to play with" She looked at the servant with pride shining out of her eyes, clearly showing that she meant every single word she said.

Salma just nodded and showed the young warrior to her rooms, "We will set up a magic lock for you to use, as we have had troubles with the boys harassing one of the female pages. Even if we aren't certain if the problems are still there we want to be sure."

Michelle raised an eyebrow "That will not be necessary, they can try and I will make them regret it." Her voice was slightly arrogant clearly showing what she meant about the pages.

The older servant left the girl in her room after showing her around the standard page room and showing her the page uniform on her bed, and telling her that she could wear whatever she wanted to dinner. The second Selma closed the door, the Shang student looked over her room checking every window and little corner to see if anything was wrong in the room, after that she looked at the page uniform like it had personally offended her "That is not going to happen."

Locking the door, she started stripping off her weapons from her clothes wrapping them down in black cloth and hiding them away under her bed. She had gotten strict orders by Master Garret, the Shang warrior who had followed her here, that all weapons were banned under dinner, maybe because he was afraid that she would lose her temper with these puppets, he knew that she hated everybody that blindly follows orders from somebody they wasn't even sure who he really was.

She sat down on her bed closing her eyes taking two deep breaths, and she slowly started to relax in her shoulders and in her back, which had been tense ever since she walked into the castle this morning "One year" she mumbled for herself "One year and I'm out of here."

She slowly started following the breathing rhyme that signals meditating "1 and 2 and 3 and 4 and 5 and 6 and 7 and 8 and 9 and 10." She breathed out, starting whispering counting again, and breathing in when the count reached 10, continuing that until she heard the first bell rung signalling that the supper bell was going to ring soon.

Opening her eyes she slowly looked around taking one last deep breath before she made her way to the door, her shoulders and back tensing up again. She slowly made her way down to the hall in front of the mess hall.

She managed to make her way into the hall a good couple of minutes before the supper bell rung, the second she took a step into hall her eyes swept around the room where she noticed two people. The one closest to the door with his back turned toward the young Shang apprentice was a boy or maybe even a man, it was hard to judge his age when she was only able to see his back. The page cloth said that he was 11-14 but his height and build told her that he was probably closer to 18 than anything else was. That sight itself should have been weird enough, but Michelle's blue eyes was locked on the person furthest away from the door, a girl. She was an unusually tall girl wearing a dress that seemed a little too short for her; also, she hardly looked like the type of girl who would suit to wear her rather feminine dress. She had many small nicks and cuts that were found all over her arms and hands that weren't able to be covered by the dress. Also she had a few on and around her face as if she had recently been in a fight. Michelle's eyes rested on the girl, and her limbs just froze. There, just in front of her, Keladry of Mindelan, the girl page 'No… that can't be true! It can't be her!'

She stared at the two, who were still talking with each other not noticing her in the doorway. Panic were clearly finding its way into her blue eyes, her shoulders becoming even more tense, and for a second she felt like she was going to run away. Before she had a chance to do so somebody knocked into her shoulder trying to get into the room, she whipped her head around in surprise. She had not heard him coming up behind her. Her eyes returned to its cold state it had been before she stepped into the room. She looked intensely at the male who tried to get past her.

When their eyes met, she raised a blond eyebrow "Excuse me?" her voice being as cold as ice, a weak blush dusted his cheekbones, and he quickly broke the eye contact with her.

"Sorry," was the only thing he said, swiftly making his way over to the two other pages. That for a second, let confusion bleed into her face. As if she was not expecting that particular answer, her eyebrows nicked together in confusion before her face and expression got blank again. She took a deep breath and stepped into the room, keeping herself close to the wall while she took a deep breath as she was trying to calm herself down. At her second deep breath, the rest of the pages as well as Training Master Wyldon made their way into the room, the same second he did that both the pages following him in and the three pages already in the room became silent. Deep respect was to be seen in all of their young faces, even if Michelle disliked the fact that he was teaching them how to be a good puppet for the king, she still respected teachers. She knew how hard it was it was to be a teacher. Every Shang apprentice had to teach the new children the one who had just come in the basics, how to make a real fist and stuff like that, Michelle hated it. The Children were stupid and slow. They did not understand anything the first time and you had to repeat stuff; you had to show them repeatedly, it drove her insane.

"As you can all see the Shang Apprentice that I told you about has arrived" he made a hand gesture toward

Michelle that nobody luckily had noticed until now as she was trying very hard with hiding out of sight. Now she pushed herself away from the wall, walking slowly towards Lord Wyldon. Straightening her back, her eyes cold while she looked over the pages.

"This is Michelle Qunari, she is the Shang apprentice who is going to train with us for the next year, as a part of our peace treaty with the Shang Warriors. She will be treated as any other page, so one will need to sponsor her to show her around the castle. Who will do it?"

The girl, Keladry, was fast to raise her hand and Michelle's heart rate started to pick up. She could not be stuck with Keladry for any amount of time! She could not be associated with Keladry at all. Luckily, one look from Wyldon made her drop it "Page Keladry I have been informed that you require to spend any of your free time that you have on your archery skill." This made Keladry's eyes drop to the ground for a short time while colour rose to her cheeks, before she looked up again her face as stone. ' _The Yamani look"_  Michelle's mind was telling her,  _'They taught her well.'_

The Shang apprentice instead focused on looking around in the room, all of the pages looked away. It was clear that nobody wanted to sponsor her, for a second she was worried before a boy that looked to be a last year page like Keladry, raised his hand. " Page Seaver," Lord Wyldon nodded, as in showing that he accepted that, then he started making his way into the dining room.

Seaver made a sign to Michelle for her to follow him, at first she was close to just keep standing there. But one look around showed her that all the other pages was going in the dinner room as well, she decided that it was probably the best if she didn't make herself stand out. If she wanted Keladry to not know who she was, it was key that she did nothing to trigger any kind of memory flashes.

Well the idea of not making Keladry really see her for whom she was, were destroyed as soon as Seaver got into line after Keladry and started chatting friendly with her 'Lovely my sponsor is buddy buddy with the one person I really, really need to not be buddy buddy with.'

After grabbing their food, Michelle really hoped, almost begging Mithros in her mind 'Please don't go sit next to Keladry, please don't go sit next to Keladry. DAMN IT!' of course he had to sit down almost next to Keladry, making it so the only space that were actually left at the table was a seat right next to the tall female page.

Michelle found herself in a dilemma; she could sit down next to Keladry and Seaver, which would be the logical explanation to anybody. However, Michelle knew what that would mean; sitting at that table would mean that they would all start-asking questions, not that she could really blame them. Shang had always been very closed off, and now after the big changes that they had made in Shang. She was probably the first Shang warrior that the pages had seen other than the ones who were trainers here, and she knew from personal experience that younger people like the pages most of the time would feel a lot more comfortable talking with people of their own age other than adults.

She really did not want to have to answer all the questions, she was a good liar and all, and she didn't even have that much to hide, but if Keladry started catching on, remembering, That could be bad. To be honest she just wanted to run away. Long away from this castle, back to Shang to her friends... and enemies. This was such an unfair punishment! If she walked away from this table, away from her sponsor that would be like sending a big message saying; "I am better than you guys!". Probably also stopping any kind of help Seaver would be giving her to find her way around, and she really needed the help, even if she wasn't ready to admit that to herself.

Michelle took a deep breath before she sat down between Keladry and Seaver, and in that moment wishing she hadn't grown her bangs long enough to join her ponytail, she now missed them to hide under.

She got herself ready to start eating when Seaver grabbed her arm; she looked at him with a raised eyebrow. Was he going to start thinking he could decide whether she was allowed to eat or not? He pointed towards Lord Wyldon, who started his… food prayer? ' _These people are strange_ ' as a Shang apprentice, she bowed down to no god. Gods were only there to cause troubles for mortals. In Shang, they were thought to create and find their own way instead of believing the gods would do it for them.

The pages all looked at Lord Wyldon giving her time to study them, on her left was Keladry, and on her right was Seaver looking closer at him she was now 100% sure that he had some kind of Bashir blood in him. He seemed like a person who would think before he spoke, a quality she would appreciate, especially because she knew it was one she didn't have, her temper simply did not allowing it.

Opposite Seaver at the table was the boy Michelle had blocked, his hair was red and straight, his eyes a shade of pale blue and his nose long and broad. The way he was sitting and holding himself made her think that he had a lot bigger temper than the well-mannered and soft spoken Seaver, he looked around the same age of both Seaver and Keladry.

To the boys right, also in front of Michelle was a younger and shorter boy sitting, he looked to be around a year younger than most of the group, his hair was a dull brown colour and his eyes grey. To be honest he looked a little dull compared to his friends, he did not have the flaming red hair, the Bashir blood, or anything else, he was just very normal.

Next to him, sitting with Keladry in front of him was the boy, (or man Michelle was not sure) that Keladry had been talking to when Michelle first saw him. Not until now had she taken her time to actually look at him, it was obvious now just how much older he was. Which was something she had not really thought about, most of all she had been excessively focused on not starting to panic. He was old, older than Michelle herself was, but he was wearing the uniform of the page, even if he looked old enough to be a knight himself, probably closer to 19 than 18. However, that was not the only thing that made him stand out. Even she had to admit he was attractive, between his tall and lean physique and his fair skin, he was good looking, but what probably was his best feature was his almost shining emerald eyes that were clearly signalling that this guy was up to no good.

A sad smile made its way to her lips; it reminded her of her friends in Shang. A place where you were encouraged to be up to no good. They encouraged you to break the rules, as long as you were not caught. If you got caught, she shuddered... never get caught. You learned that fast. She was ripped out of her thoughts when all of the pages mumbled something. After that, they started to eat, (which Michelle was quick at joining them in.) It was the first time in over a week she got the opportunity eat real food instead of whatever they had hunted and found under their journey, not that she didn't like game, or the fruit and berries they found, but with almost no real cooking or anything to spice it up, it got bland and boring very quickly.

Michelle managed to put the first few forkfuls into her mouth before the first question fell to her. This came from the red haired boy who was speaking while shoving mashed potatoes into his mouth "Qunari? It doesn't sound Tortollan, but you look Tortollan."

Michelle put down her fork and send him her best ice glare "It's a very common name in Tortall for commoners, not that I expect you to know that." The tone of voice was friendly but the undertone was very clear that she did not appreciate the question. The tip of the redhead's ears heated up and he looked down like he had been caught with his fingers in the cookie jar.

Keladry let out a little laugh at Michelle's left "Don't take Merric's comment badly, it's easy to forget that you aren't a noble when you hold yourself and eat like one." That comment earned another hard stare from Michelle.

"Well I'm sorry that I don't eat like an animal, we do learn proper manners at Shang. I'm so sorry if that makes you feel uncomfortable." Her voice was almost sharp enough to cut diamonds, Michelle hated being judged like that, even if she knew that they meant. Nothing mean about it, it was just easier for her to be aggressive towards them; it was a big part of who she was when she did not know people.

If she had expected Keladry or any of the other pages to give her back a sharp answer back like a one from Shang would she was mistaken, what she got was a laugh from the older boy "It has humour, we should probably tell you who we are. Since we know mostly who you are, but you have no clue about us." He send her a smile that did not get one back, just an annoyed look. She was not overly keen on knowing who they were; it is a lot easier to hate people you do not know.

If the blank stare and a raised eyebrow was supposed to make him stop he just ignored her and started his little speech "I would be Nealan of Queenscove, I'm a 4 year page but I would prefer to be called Neal. There you have," he pointed at the smaller boy at his right, "Owen of Jesslaw, he is a 3 year page," and then he pointed at the red-haired boy. "That would be Merric of Hollyrose. Do not take what he say too serious. To your right would be your sponsor Seaver of Tasride." Lastly, he pointed at Keladry, "And last but not least we have."

"Keladry of Mindelan" Michelle interrupted before she could stop herself, she could feel all of their eyes on her, and she had to come up with a lie quickly. She shrugged her shoulders "I am a part of Shang, we pride ourselves in knowing most of what is going on around the different countries, female rights are something close and dear to many of us, so of course we have heard of the female page. It is kind of sad it took you this long to get one. But I guess nobles have always been slow so we should be happy you got one at all."

A nervous laugh came out of them around the table, as if they were not sure if she was trying to be funny or not. She could feel how Keladry was trying to meet her eyes. However, she refused, a little afraid that her eyes would give her away, she instead just focused on eating.

"Well that was awkward" It came from Seaver, "I don't think any of us had thought of you like that, most of us are fascinated of Shang, they..." he stopped and corrected himself "you... are seen as elite warriors. As nobles, none of us has never even been able to dream of becoming a Shang Warrior, but I'm sure that many of us would jump at the chance of becoming one." She knew that what he said was again friendly, she knew that it was a compliment, and she of all people had no right to say anything against what he was saying. She took a deep breath.

Then she gave a nod "My name is Michelle Qunari, I'm a Shang apprentice on her last year." She thought for a second if she was meant to say anything else, it was no secret that Shang had gotten their own kind of 'magic', but she did not feel comfortable discussing it with them. In addition, she was afraid they wanted to see her marks that was inked on both arms and legs waiting for her to active them.

"I was trained mostly in the Tortallan camp and a couple of years in the copper isles as well, I look Tortallan cause I am. The name Qunari is a common name in Tortall yes, but it's the name I took not the name I was given." She hoped that was enough information for them to not ask anymore, and what she said was mostly right, Qunari was her taken name, and they did not need to know what her given name was.

"You look old for an apprentice; we got told it's rare that you guys gets kept in your apprentice-hood for longer than 16 or 17." Nealan blurted out.

This earned him a slight hiss she could not keep back and after that a stare cold enough to freeze over hell "And you look old enough to be a teacher here, you must have failed your test many times, weird that they would still keep you, we would have kicked you out long ago… If you had survived that long, which i doubt. So before you judge my age, remember your own." she hated when people pointed it out, she knew she was becoming old for an apprentice, many of her friends had passed years ago and she was a lot more skilled than they were. But what right did this oversized, over aged page have to judge her?! She was sure she was both smarter, faster and stronger than he could ever dream of becoming; after all, he was a doll while she was a warrior.

Another awkward laugh came from the pages around the table, most of them sounded like they wasn't sure what they was supposed to do now, all of the mostly just stared at their plate while eating, Michelle was sure that she had made it very very obvious that asking her questions was a bad idea.

After about ten more minutes of silence, they all started talking again, on the bright sight they did not try to make Michelle join in, which she was grateful for. She could not really be bothered to have a meaningless conversation with people who really meant nothing for her. She focused on her food and somewhat just zoned out, she felt like her mind was going to explode. This was like being back in the first days of Shang, finding out the lies, sorting them, and not messing up, she was happy she was older now.

"Kel? Kel? Hello? Stop zoning out on Me." it came from the red-haired Merric, that made Michelle wake half up, looking to the side, hazel meeting ice blue. Keladry had clearly spaced out while staring at Michelle.

The Shang apprentice put down her fork "Is there a problem?" She said in a slightly annoying look before casting her eyes down at the plate again. She did not want Keladry to risk recognizing her special shade of blue.

"I'm sorry, but did you grow up in Mindelan? Or anywhere near there? I have the weird feeling have seen you before." this was said hesitantly, as if she was not sure if she was allowed to ask.

"No I have never even been close to Mindelan, you could have seen me on one of the many assignment the apprentice's gets. We travel far and wide while proving we are strong enough to be warriors, even if we do not put a big flag up saying we are Shang apprentices. I can assure you that there is a lot of us, especially since we don't have a high survival rate." She casted her stare at Keladry for a short second, that had not been a complete lie, but it wasn't the whole truth either. She did not want Keladry to question it, so she made a sprinkle of sadness find its way into her words, to make it sound like it was a subject she rather avoid.

"Oh, I just have this feeling that I have seen you before, but I can't remember where" Michelle did not look at her, but it was clear in her voice that Keladry regretted asking.

The rest of the meal went on without much conversation directed at Michelle, a few times, they tried to make her join into the conversation, but she just send them a stare and then ignored them. A headache was slowly make itself known with pain gathering in her temple. It was not the noise all the pages was making, that she was used to, and when she normally ate everyone ate. All of Shang, from the small children at the age of six to the full grown Shang warriors who were home.

The problem was how she had to focus on just eating, not saying anything, normally she loved talking over the food. Her and her friends normally discussed the days training, or the news they had gotten that day, or just whatever was on their mind at that time. She knew already that this was going to be one long year.

After the meal was over, she silently followed the group back to the page quarters. They all seemed to wanting to gather in Keladrys room to finish the day's homework. They extended the offer to Michelle who, as politely as she could, declined before make her way back to her own room.

When she was about to unlock the door to her room, she noticed something was not right, the door was already unlocked! Which she knew it had not been when she left it. Within a second, she regretted she had stripped off all her weapons of when she left for dinner. She took a deep breath and pushed the door slowly open with her foot, while mentally preparing her for whatever could be waiting inside her room.

When the door was open, she saw at first nothing out of the ordinary. Other than, the darkness that her room was covered in, but a very quick flash of movement near the window caught her attention and it was the only warning before the human in the shadows was over her. She blocked an arm that was wielding a knife being aimed directly for her throat. She slipped to the side wanting to dislocate the elbow, but the instant she tried to do so the attacker blocked her, almost as if he knew what she wanted to do.

In that moment she knew who it was, it was the same man who had taught her the same trick. For a second she considered to take the option of picking a fight, she knew that he was baiting her, testing her. She forced herself to drop the defence, even if it was hard, and she could almost feel the physical pain from it.

"Master Garrett, you enjoy your tests to much." She said it in a light tone, clearly showing that she was completely comfortable around this man.

The man removed the hood covering his face, and now you could clearly see that the man was the Shang Warrior there was with her earlier in Wyldons office "You make it too easy for me, you almost gave in to your anger again." He also used a light tone and the tension the young girls shoulder reduced a lot "But I can't blame you, I'm against you being here. This punishment is too hard, especially because it's officially not a punishment." He put a big hand on her shoulder sending her a sad smile "Will you be okay?"

For the first time in the whole day, she let the masks fall. Showing that she really was still a young girl, with way too many lies, and with way too much on her shoulder. She was afraid it was evident in her eyes, afraid and worried "I don't know." She said this quietly, her voice almost shaking "It's her… She is here."


	2. Chapter 2

If Michelle thought she would have problem sleeping she was quite mistaken. She had to force herself to go through her stretches, even if she hadn't trained that day she knew she was going to regret it hard if she didn't. When the exercise was finally done, she checked that her room was locked completely. Certain that nobody could jump on her while she was sleeping.

 

She made her way over to her traveling pack, opening up the pack she found a small container of a green bluish liquid, opening up the glass container, as soon as it was opened a warm smell of honey and herbs spread throughout the room like wildfire. She took a deep breath drinking in the sweet smell. The smell itself brought good and light memories to her, it also came with the pain of her heart clenching, she was gone from Shang, she wouldn't return for another year.

 

In that second she felt as if she first now understood it, since Garrett returned to Shang yesterday, she was truly alone. Rolling up her sleeves she exposed the two skinny black marks on the underside of each wrist. The marks looked nothing like any letters in any language known to man, but there was no denying that they was very pretty on her slightly tan wrists, even if they were normally covered by her shirt.

She gathered a little of the sweet liquid on her fingers, as soon as she lifted it, it hardened slightly making her able to apply it over the marks. When it made contact with her skin it hardened even more making it into a warm balm, she could feel the magic of it spreading down spreading throughout the runes. At first it hurt and her face clenched in pain, but the pain stopped at fast as it came as the runes started to absorbed the pain.

 

As the pained look disappeared from her face, a smile found its way to her lips. The Shang deer, who was the head medic in the Tortallan Shang camp, had given her one of the best salves for the travel. It made her smile after all the time she had spend in medics room. She had learned the Deer had grown a weak spot for Michelle and her friends, they were the only ones getting into a lot of fights from even a young age, which resulted in a lot of time spent there. Even if most of the time their opponents were a in worse condition.

After finishing with her wrists she quickly took off her shirt, the temperature in the room made a chill go through her body, and she was quick at putting the balm at the rune over her heart. This time the pain was a little worse and she felt her heart clench down hard, and again it was over as soon as it came. she didn’t hesitate to put her shirt back on. Next she proceeded with folding up her black pants, revealing one black rune on the outside of each ankle. When she applied the balm this time, the pain this time was almost non existent. Michelle smiled once more before packing away the green blue liquid after making sure all of the marks had been fully covered.

After that she changed into her night cloth, and practically collapsed on the bed. As soon as her head hit the pillow she was out black. This was the first time in a very long time she was allowed to sleep in a real bed, something that she really did miss. You would think that physical and the mental exhaustion would be enough for her to sleep well, that was very wrong.

 

“Daddy, please daddy! Don’t!” The young Michelle screamed. Her shirt laid thrown on the ground after had been ripped into shreds. Blue, black and yellow marks was scattered all over her upper body. Behind her curled into a ball on the ground, was an even younger boy. If you took one look on him you could easily think that he was actually female, his blond hair long enough to reach his shoulders, and his frame was slender and small, and since he was curled up in a ball you wouldn’t be able to see his face ruling out the chance of seeing if it was a boy or girl..

The young body was trembling while he was crying, sharing the blue, black and yellow marks that was shown on the girl. You could clearly see imprints of an adults handprint on his upper arms, like a person had gripped him and thrown him along the ground.

“Look at Zachry! You are hurting us! Daddy please! Please stop daddy! I promise to be nice! Just don’t hit him anymore!” She begged on her knees, and tears was falling from her blue eyes like rain.

The man in front of her just looked at her with a hard stare, “Be quiet girl!” He brought his hand down hard, striking her on her shoulder, making her tumble over. Making her cry out in pain when her back hit the wooden floor with a loud crack as bones went under pressure.

The sound didn’t even make the man hesitate as he stepped closer for her again. His emerald green eyes met her ice blue stare. Even if their eyes were of stark difference, their blond hair and tortallian bone structure clearly showed that these two were father and daughter. But how he looked at her now showed nothing of a loving father-daughter relationship. His eyes were filled with an immoral hunger and almost bursting with rage. He grabbed her arm hard, drawing a screaming, begging plea from both the boy and girl, who both knew what was coming next.

 

Michelle’s eyes snapped opened, her breathing ragged and uneven as her arms was holding her into an almost sitting position. She was shaking like a leaf. She was happy that she didn’t have to live through the next part of the nightmare, she knew how it ended, after all she had lived through it.

It had almost been a year since she last had a nightmare like that. She had hoped she was finally over it, but that was a lie, after the fear had slightly removed itself she felt the rage taking over again, she had promised herself nothing like that would ever happen again, she had promised herself that she would fight for the innocent, even children. Michelle couldn't say that she liked children, but nobody deserved to go through what she did. On shaking legs the Shang apprentice stood up from her bed, first now she noticed the constant knocking on her door, that would be the reason why the nightmare stopped before it was over.

 

“A second! I need to get dressed!” She half yelled while finishing her morning routine and putting on her clothes. She had quickly checked that she hadn’t cried in her sleep so no tear stains was on her chins, or any tears in the corner of her eyes.

She opened the door, fully expecting to see Master Garrett, which she was surprised to see it was not. In front of her instead was the dark-skinned Seaver looking at her with a way too friendly smile, especially after how she had not been even remotely nice and friendly to his friends.

“You are not an early riser I see, I actually expected you to be, you seem like the type. Just like Keladry seems to be way too fresh and happy in the morning.” He sent her a smile that reached his eyes, and his tone was light and happy.

Michelle saw many flaws in what he just said, she was an early riser, she always had been. Which would mostly be thanks to how her Shang training had been every day. She always started as soon as the first rays of sun hit the square. At that moment she looked over her shoulder and out through her window, the sun was high on the sky, she had actually overslept. She hadn’t done that in years, she was always to first to rise since Miko and Tristin, her two best friends at the Shang camp, were late risers. Actually she was a bit worried about them, would they get up after she left? They had never been apart since she came to Shang, they were the three people making up the ‘Rise team,’ they were one of the strongest apprentice teams, if not the strongest.

‘NO! I can’t think like this, I need to be strong! I need to finish here and return home!’ she forced herself to focus on Seaver, planning her words carefully before she answered her sponsor “The trip here… has been long and hard, my body may have decided that I needed to sleep. I can assure you it will not happen again, I am sorry that you had to wake me before our lessons, I am ready to go now.” She send him a half forced smile, and she hoped that he didn’t notice that it did not reach her eyes.

It wasn’t that she didn’t like Seaver he was a quiet and nice boy, well mannered and softly spoken, something that she could respect in a person. But he was still a doll. He was still living by order of a king that couldn’t care less about him. He was still, she hesitated to herself, a noble. A noble man even. And those were all the same, abusive and violent, no matter how well they were trying to hide it. She didn’t think she could ever be over to overlook that. Her smile faded as a result.

“Do not worry, it is Sunday today, so we have neither classes nor practice today. Most of us use the time to try and catch up on homework that has been left undone as well as train in whatever we need to. Since you missed the morning bell and breakfast, I thought we could take a trip to the kitchen and I’m sure that they would understand you. Other than that I thought I would give you a tour around the castle, get your uniform from the tailor, talk with Salma about which servant will be taking care of your room while you are staying here, and last…” With that Michelle didn’t give him the chance to finish.

“Taking care of my room?!” She gave him a confused and disturbed look “I am 17 years old, I will not need a babysitter?” She sounded almost disgusted by the idea, which she really was. From Shang she was used to having to do all her stuff herself, learning from a young age that if you had to be able to be care of yourself each day before learning to take care of others.

“It’s not a babysitter, it’s so we can focus on learning to be a knight.” He send her a slight smile and started walking signaling for her to follow him.

She was standing like a rock for a just second, she wanted to start arguing with him, she could already feel the first insult on her lips ready to be released, but the smart part of her stopped it, she knew it would get her nowhere to start arguing with him. The other problem she had was that he in that same moment was telling her what to do, the way he signaled her to just follow him. Was she a dog to him? She didn’t need to take orders from him. What if she had plans for the day? No she couldn’t think like this, he was not trying to insult her, he was just trying to be nice, even if he was pushing all of her buttons.

Michelle took a deep breath before she forced her legs into starting moving again, her longer legs made it easy for her to catch up to him. She was sure that when he reached her age she would no longer be taller than him, but that fact that he was 14 or 15 and she was almost fully grown and getting close to 18, made her having an advantage in height for now.

“See over there is the kitchen.” He pointed down the corridor showing her the way to the kitchen, she just nodded following him in there, they ate a light breakfast in silence. Michelle had nothing to say, and it was as if Seaver could sense that she didn’t feel like making small talk.

After they had finished he started showing her around, first the inside, the banquet hall, the classrooms explaining to her who was teaching what in each classroom and with each of them with a little note about his personal opinion about them. She got surprised when he told her that she would be expected to join into the magic class, even if she didn’t have the gift, where they would be taught by Master Numair and Veralidaine Sarasri, even if these magic classes was thought for people who didn’t have the gift

That made her stop, “Veralidaine? The Veralidaine?”  she felt how her eyes almost got bigger. She knew of the mage, everybody in Shang had heard about her. She had a bond with all the animals, were as they only had a bond with the animal that their warriors mark was connected to. She was like a legend for them, she had not known that the mage would be in the castle. If Michelle could just talk to her, make her look at her horse, maybe she could actually confirm some of Shang’s theories about their animals.

“Yes, she prefer that we call her Daine. Have you heard of her?” Michelle was nodding fast at first, then forcing herself to slow down, so Seaver wouldn’t see just how excited she was, that was none of his business.

“Yes she had a bond with animals, we have not heard about that before.” She didn’t tell him that Shang was interested because they thought they was the only ones having that connection who was centered in Tortall.

Seaver made nod “Yeah, none of us had heard of anything like that before, she is actually young, not that much older than you. She is even a commoner just like you was well, and not even from Tortall.” That made Michelle looked at him weirdly. She had never thought that the Tortollan court would take interest in somebody that wasn’t like them no matter what her powers might have been. She stored that away in her head for later thinking, and continued listening to Seaver “But please don’t mention her for Nealan, you are just going to make him start on his long speech about how Master Numair is way too old for her, 3 years and he still has a crush on the girl.” He laughed at that before making his way to the next classroom, Michelle walking behind him with one of her eyebrows slightly lifted.

She didn’t like Nealan, she wasn’t sure that it was the fact that he was older than her or the fact that he was so curious about everything. Which could turn out to be a big problem, if it was because he was a noble or if it was because he reminded her of Miko who always got himself put into bad situations with not thinking before he spoke. She had already decided from the start that she would need keep away from Nealan, he was far too close to Keladry.

“And last but not least we have the portrait gallery, this is where many people who arrive at the castle love to visit, as you can see the queen and king.” He pointed at a painting portraying two adults, a black haired very pretty woman. She knew the second she looked at her that she was the queen even without Seaver pointing it out, she was very beautiful, and most of the Shang warriors respected her. She had done amazing work for commoners with school, and the queens riding force was a good idea.

Beside her portrait was the king’s. He was also raven haired with stunning blue eyes. She had no real opinion on the king, he was born into royalty, even if he had made changes for the better, he could have done more.

After that Seaver showed her the children of the royal couple, which she couldn’t say she was very interested in either. Many people would die before any of these children were ready to take the throne, and who knew how many of the children would be dead when that time came, after those portraits important people was shown in the next ones. But that was not what got her focus, it was the last portrait, a portrait she had seen many times before in her history books, a portrait of a man that was always close to her heart.

 

"I can see you know this one, which doesn't really surprised me." Seaver gave her a bright smile "After all he is one of yours, the Shang dragon, Liam ironarm. Gave his life for the king." He bowed lightly at the portrait.

 

Michelle looked at the portrait, the portrait was the old Shang dragon, it was the first big portrait of the man she saw since the Shang Warriors didn’t believe in keeping portraits and big stuff like that, they was suppose to be a mobile unit, able to move their camp if needed, she bowed her head showing her respect to her hero. “I know of him, he is the legend we all want to become” the tone she said it in was something the young page had not heard her use in the short time he had known her, it made him take an extra look at her, her stature wasn't tense like it was when she spoke with people, her eyes wasn't trying to kill with just a glare. For the first time Seaver saw her as she really was, a young woman with way too much on her shoulders, and a distrust in everybody around her so deep that it infested everything she was doing.

 

She was only standing like that for a few second before her facial features got back into their emotionless folds, “Are we done here? you said something about the tailor, I do not see any meaning in forcing me to wear what the pages wear, it is impractical and I am not a can on a horse. I prefer relying on my mobility. I know that the knights prefer loud noises and just looking scary, but I do not believe that it will ever get the job done, also there is nothing wrong with my clothes, they are good enough for training.”

 

Seaver stopped a second and looked at her with big eyes “What… did you just call us?” He wasn’t sure if the blond beside him was trying to make him mad or just getting a reaction out of him, or maybe she just was like that.

 

“You heard me page, I will not repeat myself.” she kept walking looking into the air in front of her, not at first noticing that Seaver had stopped. Not until she noticed the shorter page wasn’t beside her anymore did she stop and look back “Are you coming, or do Í have to find my way to the tailor myself?”

 

“You need to stop being like that. You are going to get into trouble of you keep looking down at us all just ‘cause we aren’t like you.”As he said this his lips turned into a tight thin line, as if he wasn’t really sure if it was the right thing to say.

 

This made Michelle spin around fully, her blue eyes glistening with something Seaver wasn’t sure which emotion it was. “You want my respect boy? Earn it!” she stepped closer to him, moving into his personal space, making the difference in height clear as she looked down upon him “I may be a commoner, I may just be trash to you. But remember this, I know your kind, you abusive bastards. You think you are so big and strong just ‘cause you are training to become a knight, ‘cause of your pretty titles and your land, ‘cause you happen to be born to the right mother. Wake up! Welcome to the world of adults! You want respect? Earn it! What I see is a little boy, who isn’t even sure which end of the sword to grab. You call yourself a warrior. What was your first kill? Who did you save? Who do you keep safe? You may be a knight in training, but I’m of shang, we are all that you arent, we protect to ones you can’t be bothered to. So don't talk to me about not talking down to you. Believe me when i tell you I’m not speaking down to you because you aren't like me, but because you are what you are.” she took some deep breaths. she had been speaking so fast that she had almost lost her breath.

 

She felt her whole body vibrate in anger. How could he dare? Seaver stepped a few steps backwards almost running away from her as if she burned him. He opened his mouth, then closed it again, as if he wasn't really sure what to say, that didn’t stop Michelle. She was almost seeing red as she felt her white hot rage taking over. She first tried to fight it, she knew losing control to the anger inside of her at this moment wouldn't be good.

 

Sadly she had never been very good at controlling her anger, that was even why she was stuck in this misery in the first place. Lack of control. She took one deep breath, trying to calm herself down but it wasn’t working. He was one of them, a noble bitchy noble, even if he wasn’t married yet, he would become an abusive husband, he may just be a child right now, but he would grow up to be one.

 

She felt her control slipping, it was like somebody else was taking over her limbs. She hadn’t even been here for 24 hours and she was already losing control. Her legs were shaking when she took one step towards him, the look in Seavers eyes were clear. He was scared, he should be, Michelle knew what expression was shown in her face, she had heard it been explained to her many times. When anger took  her over, it twisted her usual cold features into ones of hatred, her mouth locked in an angry snarl like a rabid dog. Her eyes no longer made of ice, but of fire and hatred, her skin turning several shades paler. Even if normally people turn red when angry, Michelle instead always turned much paler, almost a fair wintery white.

 

She really tried to fight it first, but a thought found its way into her mind. Was it really that bad if she lost control? Maybe a good beating would make sure that Seaver wouldn’t become an abusive bastard for many years, if she let the rage take over now, it would be so easy. She would scare him, make sure that he wouldn’t hit or hurt a female in many years.

 

When she took the next step towards him she wasn’t shaking anymore, she was instead stamping the ground like a mighty war horse. She wasn’t sure what she was going to do, she never really did when anger took over.

 

She had once killed a bandit that she was suppose to capture because he was pushing her buttons. When the red of the anger finally pulled away from in front of her eyes, a new red was meeting them, blood. There was blood all over, both the bandit and herself, the walls and her sword. On the other side of the room, 3 big sets of eyes meet her, showing nothing but fear. Not fear for the bandit that she had just saved them from, but fear for her.

 

She slid into battle position, her feet slightly spread, her shoulders tense eager for the bodies command that it was time to fight, but it never came, instead a skinny and old looking hand tightened around her shoulder, the Shang wildcat’s grey eyes fixed on Seaver “Page Tasrid, you should join your fellow pages, you have homework to do if I’m right.”

 

He hesitated for a moment trying to meet Michelle’s eyes, but she refused to meet his stare, just staring at The Wildcat, he saw that some of the hatred had left her cold stare, instead she was just looking annoyed at the older Shang. “Now! Page Tasrid.”

 

That stopped him from hesitating as he turned around, and Michelle had to say she was a little impressed by him, he didn’t run away, he actually walked with a little dignity, instead of running with his tail between his legs. As soon as he had turned the corner, Michelle spun around, slapping the older woman’s hand off her shoulder, “Why did you stop me? He is gonna turn into a monster, and giving him a good slapping will at least delay that. Other than that he questioned my honour, which by Shang rules gives me the right to smack, like it gives him the right to smack me back if he is stronger.”

 

“Calm down girl,” she snapped at Michelle “I can see what the elders meant with you, you are nothing more than a strong child who likes to throw temper tantrums. The boy didn’t question your honour, he asked a question ‘cause he’s curious, ‘cause for him you are an exotic warrior that he was only ever heard about in the fairy tales(. You bring shame to yourself and the Shang by acting like a spoiled brat!” She slapped Michelle her mostly scar free cheek. Or that was what she meant to do.

 

Michelle blocked the slap fast, even if it wasn’t an attack, “Do not talk down to me Wildcat. You know what the elders says, I am strong enough to deserve an Immortal title.” Her voice was low and filled with poison as she tightened her grip around the Wildcat’s hand before she let go. “But Master Garrett told me that you and the Horse are to be my trainers while I have this trial, so I will forget about this and start at new.” her tone of voice changed completely, but her eyes was still hard as ice “I am Michelle Quinai, the Shang Sword, I have been transferred here to train under you and the Shang horse for a year, before the last trials will be made.” Her voice moved to a higher level of respect to show that she recognised the Wildcat as her teacher, instead of the poisoned one she used before. She used a full bow to bow down before her, “ I hope you will accept me and we will have a pleasurable year that will be educational for both of us,”

 

They both knew that this speech was just a formality that was said every time a Shang student transferred to another camp, but they also knew that these words was to be told in truth, and if the older woman felt that the young girl in front of her was dishonest she could refuse to train her, that way making sure that it would be a long time before she could reach the full status of a Shang Warrior.

 

“I accept you as a student, the guidelines has been set out for you before this travel, and I spoke to The Unicorn yesterday, both me and the Horse are aware of your... special situation.” Also another formality, and discreetly, Michelle breathed out a sigh of relief as she knew that she had stepped over the line, but for now at least she got another chance. She couldn’t stop herself from saying stuff she shouldn’t when she was angry. The anger made her a different person.

 

The Wildcat continued “Since you have scared away you guide for the day.” She made a nod in the way Seaver had disappeared “I will show you around, but I expect this to not happen again.” Her stare at Michelle was hard, and for Michelle it was clear that The Wildcat knew about her anger problems. It was also clear that Michelle had to try her best to control her anger, losing it was not gonna be an option, she needed The Wildcat to accept her, to train her, for her to allow her to do her test when she was ready. It was her only wish.

 

Michelle made a hand signal as if to say ‘show the way’, making the Wildcat send her one last warning glare before showing her down to the tailor, the elderly man took one look up and down before he scuffed “Too small to be a grown warrior.”

 

The Shang’s eyes got big, did he just? “Too small, TOO SMALL!? Have you any idea of what… hmpf” The Wildcat had put her hand over Michelle’s mouth, very clearly telling her to stop speaking.

 

“Stupid girl, stop taking it like everybody is out to insult you.” She looked at the tailor “I’m sorry for this ones manners, we normally make sure that she doesn't speak to anyone, unless we need her special kind of madness.” She sent a very angry look at Michelle.

 

The blond could almost feel how the anger was surging through her, she wasn’t full of madness. She was right to be mad, how dared the man call her a too small to be a warrior. Just because she wasn’t the size of an giant knight in a metal suit!! She was a real warrior, the hand in front of mouth moved and she opened it to speak, to tell the guy just how much of a warrior she was, but again she got a slapped over the back of her head from Eda.

 

Michelle took a deep breath, ice almost coming out of her eyes as she stared at the wildcat, but she didn’t say anything it wasn’t the time to push the wildcat, she turned her stare to the palace tailor who was picking out her uniform for her.

 

What confused her what the weighted vest that she got given, she looked strangely at the wildcat “They don’t expect me to actually wear this do they? how the fuck i am suppose to fight in this?” Eda just sent her a wicked smile.

  
Michelle sent the vest an evil look and shook her head ‘This is gonna be a long year.’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this bit is very boring, but i swear as soon as i get the story started a lot of... not fun but, fun? stuff is gonna happen! I SWEAR!
> 
> As always kudos and comments makes my little heart sing <3
> 
> -Sheiala over and out

**Author's Note:**

> As always, Comments and kudos makes my little sing ^^
> 
> \- Sheiala Over and out
> 
> Also i own nothing other than Cassandra


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